What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
