it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Randomize
