Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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