I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
