ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
