You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Also—I just realized that your wedding gift is still on my dining room table. So...as awful as I am for not yet sending it (and I still need your address), at least I didn’t bring my screaming children to potentially the most important day of your life?
Randomize
