He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
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No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
These tits shall not be calmed
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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