He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Randomize
