Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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