And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize
