Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Enjoy the penises
Randomize
