i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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