Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize