You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
