Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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