Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Randomize
