ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
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