Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize