She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Randomize