Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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