sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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