Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
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