god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
The struggles of a small town man whore
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize