U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
Are my feet made of real feet?
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
