I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Randomize
