She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Randomize
