Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
