i would punch a child for taco bell
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
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