Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
i believe in u and ur pee
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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