It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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