i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
