absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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