508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Fuck me I smell like cheese
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
