you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize