Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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