next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
