Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize