did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
