So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
I love having hate sex.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize