Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
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