If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Randomize