He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
