I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
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