Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
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