she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
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