their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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