I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Come on in and take your pants off
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