he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
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