Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
