Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
